The Theft Protection

Myths and Facts About Identity Theft

[music] Play and learn and learn and play with PC play and learn PC play and learn Yes this an April fools joke And yes we are actually doing this PC play and learn was a series of educational children’s games That i played a lot when i was younger And by younger i mean three to four years old This series was really obsceure so there’s a 99% chance you’ve never heard of it In fact its so unknown that the Wikipedia page for it isn’t even complete PC Play & Learn: Learning Fun with Dan and Whizzo was a British software by macromedia in the 2000s And that’s it. Then it just lists the characters in the game To be fair though there’s really not much else to say about it The games would come as disks delivered to your home every few weeks as part of a subscription And also came with booklets to support them Although I’m pretty sure i never opened those, like even once The main event was always the CD rom And after a bit of digging i was able to find some disks that I somehow managed to keep through all these years So i though why not check one of them out for old times sake Each instalment in the series would have a different theme The first one being [Dan] Let’s make friends! [Simi] Ok worry not, there’s nothing wrong with your screen that’s just the actual resolution of the game But it’s alright [Resolution being fixed] [Dan] Hello! Good to see you again! Grab your passport [Simi] Good to see me again wut? Wait, DOES THAT SAY 14! What was i doing playing this game at 14 years old I clicked on my profile to check what was going on And apparently I’d set my favourite food as pizza My favourite animal as a lion And my favourite colour as yellow I entered at the game to check how far I’d gotten And it looks like i only managed to collect 1 of the 4 dinosaur egg pieces Which is what you get for completing each of the games in the disk That doesn’t really surprise me though because as you’ll see in a moment This game, while possibly a challenge for a three year old Presents no sort of mental stimulation whatsoever For anyone over the age of 7 I backed out so i could create a new profile Or passport as this game calls it Never to early to learn about border control i guess [Dan] Click on your passport If you don’t have, one click here [Highlights passport box] And we’ll make you one [Simi] Click here you say? Alright then THUGLIFE Wait are thug life memes still allowed n 2018 meh, it’s April fools day who cares I created my passport naming myself egg And gave myself the ironic age of 75 to mask behind a charade of comedy The fact that even my real age Is still far too old to be playing this game I then chose my favourite food, animal and colour [chuckle] guess somethings never change Selected my dinosaur Oh yeah, all the characters in thes games at dinosaurs by the way In case you haven’t picked that up already And then i entered the game [Twinkle] [Dan] Cmon! Here we go! [Simi] Here in the play zone i was introduced to the main characters [Dan] Raaaarrrrgh I’m a Dan! And I’m a dinosaur [Weird bat] Yibbedy yeee [Dan] That’s Whizzo [Whizzo] Habbeddy hop [Dan] Watch where you’re flying Whizzo [Whizzo] Habbeddy hop Bonk Habbeddy bubbeddy boo [Dan] Whizzo says Welcome to the playzone! [Simi] Actually no, I thi, I think he said Hubbety Bubbety Boo Dan preceded to give me the run down on how to use the controls And afterwards entered the most annoying character in the whole game Yes, even more annoying than Whizzo The one that constantly does this Hubbeddy hobbeddy hoooooo [Annoying character] Helloooooo Hellllloooooooooo! I’m home you lucky dinosuars [Dan] That’s my big sister Pink She goes to school [Simi] Oh come on they could have done a better job on the sound effects there You know what, let me redo that for them [Dan] She goes to school [GOD LIKE SOUND EFFECTS] [Dan] I bet Wizzo and I go everywhere together We’re best mates [Whizzo] Squaarr [Dan] That’s how Whizzo and I call l each other We squark Like this [Dan Squarks While Music In The BackGround Goes SQAAAAAAAAAA] There are doors on each level 4 of which lead to a game you need to complete so you can get a piece of the dinosaur egg There are also doors which do other things Like the joke door (Dan) KnockKnock. (Pink) Who’s There? (Dan) Dishes. (Pink) Dishes Who? (Dan Laughs At His Own Joke And Also Laughs For Pink Because Of How Not Funny It Is.) [Simi] Did you notice that Pink’s laugh came out of Dan’s mouth That means that either the animators messed that one up or the joke sucked so much he literally had to laugh for her The first game i checked out was the number game and it was called number hide and seek [Dan] Do you want to play the easier game for little guys like me or do you want to play the harder game for big kids like my sister [Pink] Click on one of the buttons when you’ve decided [Simi] You know what, i think i can handle the harder difficulty Did you know i beat God of War 3 ON TITAN MODE Di, Did you know I got half way through Cuphead [small chuckle] This is the game You take the numbers Put them in the tube in the right order and as you put each number in You reveal a character that was hiding behind them If this was the harder difficulty for the game WHAT ON EARTH WAS THE EASIER DIFFICULTY [Ding] Okay, I’m out I find it hard to believe that even me at three or four, whenever i played this Would have found this difficult in the slightest No bragging Okay, maybe I’m bragging a little bit When was 4 years old I could count to 10 EASY [Music] [Delilah lands on the trampoline and gunshot sound effect is added] [Delilah] Hi, I’m Delilah! [She laughs] [Whizzo] Yibbeddy yeeee [Delilah] Use the down arrow to explore the play zone. And you might just find some more magical doors [She laughs again] Weeeeeee [Gunshot sound effect is added] [Simi] The next door led to a music game And all you had to do in it was select the instruments at the top in the order you wanted them played and the press one of the pink buttons to hear the song in either a slow or a fast tempo [Instruments are being played] [Simi] Ahhh, like music to my ears I was then given this wonderful printout cetificate Making me an official member of the dinosaur band Which i now realise i didnt need to print out at all I could have just looked at it On the screen Well that was a waste of ink and a frame and also I’m pretty sure my printer is running out of ink After shoting some hoops, I ent through the letter door to try out the next game [Pink] When i tell you about one of our toys Click on the letter it starts with But watch out I’ve put some extra letters on the shelf to make it trickier [Simi] Ohhhh NooOOooOOoo Well now this is gonna be impossible Okay, the game was really straight forward They show you a toy and you match the toy to the letter its name begins with realistically this game could be completed in about 10 seconds But it ends up taking much longer than that Because before you can match anything You have to listen to Pink’s entire monologue about whatever it is you clicked on [Pink] Thats Whizzo’s toy spider Spider begins with the sound sssssssssssssssssssssssss The letter s makes the sound sssssssss Click on the letter s [Simi] Wait she even tells you what letter to click on [Ding] But I chose the big boy version Or more like ththth the big girl version [Pink] The letter C makes the sound c Can you find the letter C [Captain Price] MISSION FAILED, we’ll get em’ next time [Simi] I matched the rest of the letters and after having to listen to Pink’s Interesting letter rhyme [Pink] I’m an M Jump around Let me hear you say my sound mh mh mh mh mh mh mh mh mh [Simi] I collected my third dinosaur egg peice and headed back to the playground There were still two doors i had yet to open One of them being this music door [Music] Nah, I still think my song was better [Simi’s Music] The last door was on the top floor hidden righ behind Pink’s head [Pink] Have you found all of the magic doors in the playground yet [Simi] Maybe i would if you MOVED OUT OF THE WAY I eventually managed to get into te last game which required me to match the correct animal parts together It was also this game when i realised That Pink’s voice is so high pitched and over excited that everything she says sounds like she’s being extremely sarcastic [Pink] Wow, You’ve made a cow You really helped me out Thanks [Simi] After matching the third animal I was awarded the final egg piece and was finally able to see the dinosaur i had unlocked in dinoland Sportysaurus [Boings] Okay this thing just looks ridiculous [Dan] Sportysaurus loves playing ball What’s your favourite sport? [Simi] Well I mean I was scoring trickshots a little earlier, just saying [Dan] Hit the print button for a cool picture of your dinosaur [Simi] No thank you Printer ink is expensive and i just wasted mine on this certificate I headed back to the play zone And with all the doors now completed The only thing left was fun time with Whizzo This would be and extra game they put in for fun and on this disk the game was a version of whackamole [Dan] Whenever he pops up, you have to click on him and give him a good tickle [Chuckles] Like this [Simi] I think moving a bit quicker than that would be beneficial as i played the game i slowl began to lose my mind since Whizzo would repeat the same stupid noise Everytime i clicked on him [Simi’s brain slowly melts away] [Dan] What a score! [Simi] Yep 21 points I’m pretty sure i destroyed any highscore 4 year old me would’ve gotten 14 year old me on the other hand [MORE MUSIC] yeah since i completed all the games and seen the dinsaur i’d unlocked already It seemed Pink and Delilah had nothing left to say So on that note, I think it’s time to wrap this up PC Play and Learm It is a great game I’d reccommend this game to anyone who is illiterate errr, anyone who needs help counting to 10 or if that’s just too advanced for you 5 Baby steps ya know and also anyone who is really into dinosaurs they’d love this if you wanna pick this game up for yourself You can turn back time about 15 years or so Make sure you live in the UK Pick up a copy of the primary times magazine From a child’s bookbag order the free promotional CD with a demo of the game watch the infomercial at the end of siad CD and send back the reply slip that comes with it along with payment details so you can start your subscription and if you reply with in 7 days you even get this cool electronic keyboard absolutely free or you could just get it off ebay, whichevers better for you so with the first disk now completed I guess the only thing left to do is make our way out [Dan] Is it already time to say goodbye if you want to stay and play some more click on Whizzo But if you really have to go Click on me [Whizzo] quaaarrr [Dan] Yipppeeeee [Pink] Hey, your back [Simi] I just wanted to see what would happen if you clicked on Whizzo but it seems to have brought these guys back to life atleast Okay but we’re actually gonna go. Shut up Delilah [Dan] Okay Bye then Visit us again soon [Whizzo] Fabbeddy Flyby [Dan] Goodbye Thanks for coming to play [Simi] Aaaww that is so cute and then they’ve got a little credits section at the end You know what dan Maybe I will come back to visit you again soon Maybe I will PHSYCH Happy april fools day everyone and er, happy easter too [Game show outro] [Hell] HUBBEDDY BUBBEDY BOOOOOO

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